BACK HOME!

OMG it's been almost a month after my last post. I have been lazy!

Neways, for those who don't know just informing you guys that I am back in Malaysia.
Waiting for this day really killing me, two weeks of works and dramas in Canby is worse than having exams.

It feels so nice to be home. There are some of you who I haven't meet yet, if you guys have time please message or call me lar. Let's meet up and hang out abit. Let me miss you guys abit mah... Hehe..

Well, I just came back from camp today. I am super tired now. Just dropped by here to announce that I AM FINALLY BACK!!! So now I really need a rest...will talk to you soon...>!

peak level of boredom

Exams ended at last. But I wasn't really in the mood of blogging. Sorta lazy to update anything nowadays.

Just came back from Melbourne not long ago. There is time when I am bored and there is time when I am having time. Honestly, Melbourne is a very beautiful place.

I am just bored now. Not working, don't want to drama, don't know what to do. I just want to go back home as soon as possible.

Personality test

A test I just took...How accurate it is?

Do you really think so of me?

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.


Try it...
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Right before it ends

TIRED and BORED
(That's how I looked now, tired and bored but as lovely as ever)
*shy*wink*

Half way reading text for tomorrow's final paper of the semester. Finally, it comes to an end. It's been more than a month I am stressing over the exams. I bet most of you know what's going on, as far as I concerned, I think I complained to everyone. Haha...Guess I was just so sick of exams and studies...

The toughest, most scary, terrible, horrible paper finished yesterday. As expected, CAN'T DO. Don't think that I am exaggerating because I am not. Apparently out of five question I can only answer one question. I didn't cry after the exam, just gave up during the exam. And I think it's better for me to save my tears now till when I get my result in two weeks time...YAYYY.....Bless me that I won't jump off from the building...wakakkaka...

I got the feelings that I will be missing the lifestyle I am having during exams period. Before you sleep, you study. When you are awake, you study. Before dinner, you study. After dinner, you study. Lunch and breakfast always study together with you in the room. Coffees become your closest friend who you CAN'T afford to lose. Bed is now your enemy. What a lifestyle......I guess that's how everyone gonna be when you are in university.... Don't think it's easy as what others said, as apparently it is thousands times tougher than your SPM!

Neways, parties in a row after tomorrow. Leaving a week for Melbourne next Monday. SHOP, BINGE, CAMWHORE, are all I am going to do!!!! Anyone feels like joining me????

Pre-exams syndrome

Tonnes of thoughts will suddenly popped out of my mind when it's near exams everytime. I wonder why...

*Determined to lose weight(since long time ago but never see the effect)
*Trying to plan trips
*Trying to get in contact with friends(msn 24/7)
*Thinking how to improve self dicipline
*Thinking how the others are doing back in Malaysia
*Missing family and friends heavily suddenly
*Trying to update blog as much as possible
*Check mails every hour(but there is only average a mail within 2-3 hours)
*Try to update profile in facebook and friendster
*Being nostalgic enough to keep viewing pictures taken in the past
*Etc etc etc

All sort of things that will try to stop you from continue study......
Pressure? Stress?
Procrastination........
Serve you right Jesswynn....

!!!

BORED BORED and BORED.

I am supposed to study now but it seems that no inputs are being absorbed.
Might as well I spend some time telling you guys stories...

Last Sunday when I went to work, I actually went bus interchange an hour early.
It was my HP's clock. Both of HP automatically updated itself due to day light savings which ended like 1 2 weeks ago?

Wasn't aware of my watch actually showed seven something in the morning instead of eight somethng. No wonder I saw no one in the interchange, weird scene. Luckily my housemate gave me a message asking why am I heading to work so early. zzzZZzz

Finals really tearing me aparts. It's been two weeks that I am not having a good sleep. It's not that I am not sleeping but what's the point of waking up every hour and study for 15mins before you went to sleep again? Every hour every night every day..... T.T

Climate in Canberra is so extreme recently. It can gets really cold like winter and suddenly it gets soooo HOT, something like in Malaysia I guess. I couldn't stand the heat. It's really killing me. This kind off weather makes my nose bleed so frequent. ARGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I need aircond but I need heater at the same time!!!!!!!!!

How to survive?????? Even now also I am so freaking HOT!!!!!!!!!PANAS gilerrr.....

感触

电话已挂上，
眼里的泪就快落下，
妈妈的那一番话让我犹不自禁的哭了。
一直担心有的没的，
却没全心全意的专心读书，
面临着两个礼拜后的考试的我，
觉得很对不起爸妈，
我竟然把他们的血汗钱扔进火坑，
这样的成绩，让他们失望了。。。。

妈说：尽力就好。。。过的一天就一天，最重要的是要开心。。无须担心什么的，船到桥头自然直。。熬多几年绝对不是问题。。。需要的时候，要到处挖都会挖到给你。。你的爸妈是行的，姓黄的都是行的。

妈让我更依赖她了。。。可是现在的我是不是应该马上回去做书虫的世界呢？

STRESS

ARGHHhhh......Exams coming in two weeks time.... I haven't even start anything yet..... STRESS like hell but what can I do?????????? STUDY everyday is really killing me.......!!!!!!!

GOOD DAY GOOD MOOD!

Another busy day at work place. HOWEVER, I wasn't that stress anymore when doing coffee. Things go kind of well for me. I don't reckon myself for doing good coffee today but there are customers who think so.

Colin(the manager of cafe) came to me suddenly in the noon saying that there are customers reckon my coffees are much better than coco black(a shop which sell coffees and chocolates; I heard there is branch in Malaysia not sure bout it) in the city. Fantastic! That's what I answered when people asking how am I after that.

ALSO, there is a reservation with about 30 veterans having their coffee after meals. Once again, my coffees served them well. I was really excited and sort of proud of myself(in my heart). Want to try my coffee?

It's spring now in Australia. You started to see lotsa white fluffy thingy flying all around Canberra. It's just like snowing everywhere. I asked my colleague what's that. Guess what she said? According to her, there is this myth saying that if you saw the white fluffy thingy flyin everywhere and you haven't start studying for your exams, you are screwed up! The white thingys are from the trees. I never see the trees before. It happens every year somewhere near the exams. That's why she said you are screwed up when you haven't start study!

Just imagine there is white fluffy cotton flying everywhere in Kuala Lumpur. That's exactly what happened here! Trust me it's really beautiful. I couldn't snap photos cause you won't be able to see it in the photos.

Kuih muih time!

I am currently at common room using pc while waiting for my kuih keria in the oven. It's for the upcoming event. Dessert night with the theme of deeparaya and I am in charge of kuih keria for 250 pax. So now I am trying out whether it will turn out successful or not. If not later people will shoot my kuih keria... SOB SOB....


Very first task after becoming one of the commitee of MSO. How well and how far can I go?

Take a guess.....

Looking for my soul

I am absent minded from last Sunday until today I guess. I wasn't aware of what I am doing, and always took like two seconds before I can respond to others. What is wrong with me? I wasn't sad or down. I am all good all fine but I think my soul went out for travelling.

The first thing I did when I was at work is BROKE a water bottle last Sunday. Then spilt the drinks, bang the tables, dropped the milkshake. I don't know what more I did. Yesterday wasn't a good day either. I knew I did something but I just couldn't recall. I just know that I keep switch off the light when I went into the toilet or my room. But I didn't switch it on immediately. In fact I took some time to think what I've did before it comes to my realize that the light is off.

I went in work earlier today as they need people. I was sleeping and half blur. First task of the day, people asking for coffee I made tea instead. Fine. Thought it was just a mistake. Not long after, people wanted hot chocolate to take away, what I did? I put in the mug for them. I don't know what was I doing! Even people talk to me also I don't know. OMG.....

The best thing is after I came back and took a shower, I went online. Half way online, suddenly I had this memory flashed by. I couldn't recall whether I shampoo myself when I shower just now. I tried to think as hard as possible but I just couldn't remember. OMG......


WHERE are my SOUL?

Latest updated

Its been a week after midterm holiday starts. Have been doing nothing other than work work and work, not even studies. It's a busy week after all. Last Friday, went to floriade night fest but tickets were sold out. Floriade comes together with spring. It's time when all the flowers blossom. It's a yearly event in Canby I guess. At the end I was licking MacDonald's ice cream in Canberra centre. Thought of starting my revision in the midnight, ended up clubbing with friends. It was an unforgettable night. It's reflex for it to come to imaginary vision, though brain is controlling hard on it. Helpless.

Saturday night, went to Nara festival. It's an anniversary celebrating the alliances between Canby and Japan. That was what I know. It's a cold night, windy. People were rushing there when I am on the way there. Event ends at 9pm. It was 6.30pm back then. Nothing much bout Nara, the most special about it would be the candles. Candles were lighted surrounding a tower, more like people made their wish or pray in front of the tower. Didn't know what that actually was. Walked around, dropped by some stalls for games and food. Was fun but was tired at the same time until it came to a wishing tree. It might sounds lame or stupid when modernised people still believing in it, same thought was running in my mind. On the other hand, you saw I was writing and tying my wishes on the tree. What wish could it be? Some wish that I thought I won't be wishing all the while.

Tuesday morning, headed to day time floriade. Night fest ended on Sunday. It's a yearly event, have to drop by at least for a minute. It's all about flowers. It's all about photography. It's all about being artistic. I am the photographer. I am the artistic person. Catch the photos on my facebook. No doubt, you will agree with my phrases above. It's not self praise.

Wednesday, went to Narooma bay. Whale watching. Slept along the way there for 3 hours and plus. Jetty seems pitiful to me. No people around, no shops around, not even cars passed by lots. I wonder how it will be. It was a sunny day for Aussie, it was like desert for me. Couldn't stand the heat. Went on the boat, journey looking for whale started. Strong winds made the boat wavy, really wavy. Felt like the boat is going to capsize in no time. Half hour just passed, nothing turned up, boredom came to me. Sleepiness followed after boredom. Everyone was waiting quietly for whale to show up. It came to everyone attention when someone shouted. It's really whale. It's two of it. It's really huge. It's so unbelievable that a whale was in front of me. Hilarious....

Check out the photos in facebook. Laziness really grabbing me from upload it again and again. Hope you enjoy the pictures.

Short update about me.
Currently studying for finals. Getting fatter and trying to lose weight.
Was sick these two days after the whale watching....Heat stroke I assumed.
Missing home as usual.


Cheers
Jesswynn^^

Jogging

I fell down today when I went jogging with my friend. This is the first time I fell down after so long. Somemore this is the first time I went jogging with this friend. So unlucky. Haih.

The funniest thing is we took lots of picture along the way. So I would say that other than jogging, the main thing we are doing is camwhoring. Pictures are available in facebook. I am really really really jogging. Diet is needed here.

Life

Class ended early today. I saw my paper which I almost failed. I was really upset about it. I always think that this subject is one fo the easy subject that I can do. But I never expect that it might be the worse result among all the subjects. I think i have to get rid the mindset of 'this subject is easy and I can always do it'. Hard works start now!

It seems like I am sort of motivated but throughout the whole day I didn't do much thing except for two tutorial questions. SlacK. But Sze Huey actually inspired me through MSN. It's been long time I never really being so serious msn-ing. I guess she is almost the same person as me when I am serious? Haha. She talked bout life which I always looking into.

Both of us think that hard work doesn't play the most important roles in life. Not to say that we no need hard works but there is something come before it, UNDERSTANDING. Some people have the understanding but some people are pursuing after it, said Sze Huey. How if we couldn't look the path towards it throughout the whole life? She said, that's depend on my decisions and thoughts.

Her words really make me think lots. I am always playful and never take things seriously. I was thinking is it the time for me to get serious? Is it the time to be matured? Hmmm that's a tough one. There is lots of thing for each of us to learn, getting into university is just part of it. All of this, not that I never thought of. It is always at the corner of my mind. Just that thinking of the responsible and stress that I am going to face pushing it aside.

How many people out there really can stand out as someone different? I used to be very confident that I am one of them. I used to believe in myself so much that I am different from everyone. I used to trust my own capability. I used to imagine myself as one of the successful person in future. I used to know that Wong Yunn Yi is a great person. It might sounds that I am overconfident but that's what I used to hold.

Getting into university, what I used to think of myself suddenly vanished. I started to be someone opposite. I become a negative thinking, emotional person. Until after the election, I know I have to find back who I used to be. I must look back whatever I had and hold on that tightly. I don't want to be some slackos out there.
Thankz Sze Huey.

Time to start understanding what I am doing.

STANd uP

Let's crap abit today. I just got my midsemester exam for one of the subject. And I did badly for it, worse than last semester. Or I shall say that this is the worse result I ever gain during my study life for 20 years. I was really disappointed with it. I never expect it would be this. When I saw the result, my heart is broken into ashes not pieces!!

I was really sad and complained to some of my friends. As expected, you will be hearing you are actually smart, you are not dumb, you might did some mistake and all the comforting sentences. I know that they are trying their very best to make me feel better. But it just didn't work that way. I just want someone to listen to me and comfort me though the comforting sentences are not useful.

I know that I won't just fall and stay at where I am standing now. I know that I will move on. All the sadness and complains are just the way of making myself feel better. It's temporaily frustration that I am face with. Only after complains and tearings, I can really feel better and motivated again. I can't change something happened, but I always have the power to change something which is happening. So now what? USE the power!

To all my dear friends out there, thank you very much for listening and comforting your helpless friend here. All your efforts are much appreciated. Your friend, me is once again recovered from before, living for a better one. Self-confidence are back....

Random post

Sorry guys I know I haven't been updating my blog for a long time. I was having exams for the past two weeks lar..... Really getting busier!!

Anyways, there is nothing much I can say also. What I did is just study whenever I am free and try to catch up with my studies mah. This semester damn stressful. Even now mid semester exams are over I still have my assignments dueing AND AND AND I have to start my preparations towards finals. You see I where got time to sit down and update myself?

Oh ya, recently I went for an election to be president in this society but hehe I lost. I only become general committee. I know that sounds abit lousy to be announced here, but yea I think it's not a bad thing after all that I am not elected. You no need to know the reasons why as long as I know. Hahaha..... Shhhhh.....

So ya, I get even hectic when I am one of the committee because there are few events coming up soon and that's like two weeks before my finals. OMGGG!!! My time is really occupied. But but if you guys really want to update about me, you can always see me online. MSN is always my favourite hobby. Haha...

Mid authumn festival just passed. For those who don't know what is that, it's mooncake festival(Malaysian's styles). It's pretty sad that I can't be with my family, LONER. Haha. But the most important thing is I missed out the mooncake this year. They do sell mooncake here if you go Asian Groceries Shop but like I said NO TIME to even step out of the room!! But at least me and few of my friends cooked something nicer and so called celebrated it. Everyone is missing home........cause of MOONCAKE!

Alright then, I have to go back to study now. Have been slacking for quite a while. Will try to update as much as possible k.. Thanks for the concern everyone.....love ya

阴天的我

今天的我，心情很沉重。
好几次，泪，不知不觉地从眼里流下。
好想知道，悲哀的根源在哪儿。。。。
因为她？或是他？
最近承受的压力已经不少，现在更是火上加油。。
我就快崩溃了。。。
能够支撑到现在，也是为了那区区的考试。。。
唉，天哪！！！！
我不喜欢崩溃的感觉！！！
就还有那几个月，可以让我安心快快乐乐的过吗？
拜托嘛。。。。。

For you : NICK and Zhi Yuan

This post is specially for Nick and Zhi Yuan. I am so sorry Nick that I left out your name in the thank you list. I know I sort of left out something but I couldn't remember until Zhi Yuan msn me last night. I am always not aware with things and people around me. SORRYYYYYY....... Thousands APOLOGIESSSSSSSSS.........

THANK YOU SO MUCH NICHOLES CHEN.


So hard to see his face....(Maybe that's why I missed out his name...OPPPS)
Again can't see.....
Finally, this is Nick.......Keke....

Nick:
Please forgive me okay.....
I will make sure there is no next time.....
I will open my eyes BIG BIG and widen my sight's range next time.....
SO SORRY....


For Zhi Yuan, he was upset that his photo wasn't up for the MASCA NCG game. So now.......

CHUA ZHI YUAN......Gordy......SOMEONE??!.......

TIO SHER REEN & CHUA ZHI YUAN...


P/S : Zhi Yuan this is specially for you and NICK... Make sure you guys read ar............ Be PROUD at the same time that I actually sacrificed my study time for this..... HEHE...Joking.....

Politicals

Two more weeks there will be election for MSO commitee. MSO is Malaysian Student Organisation in ANU and it's the most active society in ANU. Everyone is campaigning in order to gain more votes during the election. There is total 8 positions, President, Vice President, Secretary, Treasurer and 4 General Commitees. Now that there is this party running around the campus stating who is running for all the above positions. The main thing is there is few candidates that none of us reckon as capable.

So basically what we did is we decided to just ignore what we saw. But the other day a friend of mine was telling me that since we are not satisfied with them we should in fact get someone who can run against them. I do admit that I have the intention to run for a position at first, but my intention just vanish from my thoughts after I saw the party formed.

I think I wouldn't like to be part of them. Obtaining votes through networks and not capababiity is always not what I am looking forward to. Of course, if you have the capabability and people vote for that it would be a different thing. But it seems like they are helping each other to get the positions in MSO neglecting the other members. It seems like University also have all the political issues.

I was chatting with my friend about this. She actually did some analysis on me. According to her, I am those kind of person who can excel in analysis problems than making decisions. Her best suggestion is vice president because vice president's job is less stressful and it seems like easier. I don't know whether I should take it as complement or what. It make me sounds like I am like a worthless piece of paper. Hehe.... I always know that I can't do a good job if I am stress out. My EQ is very low. And what I have done all this year is to improve my EQ, but it seems that it never gets better. I might need to work harder then....

I just feel that from this issue, I think I might need to work harder and improve myself. I couldn't give people the impression that I am capable, people just don't recognise me as someone better. Sometimes I do feel that people will only thought of me when all the good one they thought are gone. I just don't stand out as someone special. But this will not stop me to be a better one.

I made a wish for my birthday this year...

I hope I can be someone people acknowledged as BEST.

Words of thankz~

I will really say that I had a great birthday here. Without your care, love and thoughts my birthday might be nothing......nothing at all....

Really appreciated what you guys did for me, all the celebrations, all the efforts, all the thoughts, all the wishes, all the calls........ Really thank you very much. I am not a good writer or a good speaker, other than saying thank you and giving hugs I don't know what else I can do to express my feelings. I hope you guys can really feel the appreciations and love from me.

First celebration
This is the party organized by my housemate and coursemates. They really put in lots of effort to live up the party and try to do whatever they can to make sure I am contented. Thank you sooo much.....

*Huiling*
*Kahee*
*Shuyi*
*Chivone*
*Geofrrey*
*Huiqin*
*Aron*
*Dexter*
*Sunchuan*

Eve and the Day after
What else I can say bout you guys? Nothing much but just want to give everyone of you a big hug. You guys have been the one take caring of me ever since I stepped into land of Australia. Helping me in so many things. Really glad that I got to know the most incredible leng chais and leng luis in ANU. Thank you so much Leng chais and Leng luis.....Love you guys... Muakzz

*Sher Reen*
*Weiling*
*Melissa*
*Latha*
*Gordon*
*Qizheng*
*Zhiyuan*
*Alex*
*Melvin*

On the day
Nothing much I did today like I said. It's all the wishes and calls that make me feel warm and hot even without the heater especially those who called from Malaysia. Thank you so much. And I definitely missing you guys now!!! Definitely!

*Anne*
*Siewwui*
*Kelly*
*Leong*
*Cheah Siang*

Thanks guy for the calls. It really nice and warm to hear your voices in such a cold weather. Cheah siang actually recorded birthday song sng by him and sent to me through msn. Thank you soo much. That's really so nice of you. You are the sweetest............. THANKS darlings....


Of course thanks again for those who send me wishes through sms, friendster and facebook. There is quite a number of you so I couldn't actually list our every name here. But But But, you all still receive the most sincere thanks from my heart. HEART to HEART..... Hehe.

Last but not least, there is one person I never mention even in the previous blog. But she is the most important person. My MUMMY.... Thanks you soo much mum... Without you I couldn't be in any part of the world now... Your love is my everything.. Thank you so much..... I MISS YOU...DAd... The same thing goes to you.... I know I am like you, don't really know how to express our feeling...hehe...LOVE YOU...*muakz*




THOUSANDS HUGs and MUAKZz